A call to arms: Let loose the dogs of spiral-throwing

Dwight Perry
The Seattle Times
Coincidence?
On the same day Michael Vick gets released from federal prison, new Tampa Bay Bucs coach Raheem Morris describes his quarterback competition as "One bone. Five dogs. Best man wins."
Paging Herman Franks
The hapless Washington Nationals suffered yet another embarrassment this month when foil-wrapped hot dogs exploded as team mascot Screech was shooting them into the stands from a sausage shooter, subjecting fans to falling shards of wiener shrapnel.
On the bright side, though, the Nats just found a spray hitter for the meat of the lineup.
Grab a No. 2 pencil
Sports quiz question, courtesy of Chris Ferrell of the San Antonio Express-News:
"When Terrell Owens said 'my focus is really trying to get this offense down and see what ways I can help the team,' he was talking about:
"a) Learning plays during his first practice with the Bills.
"b) Figuring out which plays aren't designed specifically for him and ordering them removed from the Bills' playbook."
News flash
In a move seen as equal parts symbolic and cost-cutting, the bankrupt Phoenix Coyotes will play all their home games on thin ice next season.
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He launches 'em
Astronauts completed their work Tuesday on the aging Hubble Space Telescope, 350 miles above the Earth's surface, and headed for home with some souvenirs plucked out of orbit.
As in two meteorites and three Josh Hamilton home-run balls.
Quote marks
• Comedy writer Jerry Perisho, on Larry Bird and Steven Spielberg received honorary degrees from Boston University: "They have a lot in common. In the 1980s, Spielberg made 'The Color Purple' and Bird humiliated it."
• Brad Rock of the Deseret News, after the Citi Field streaker revealed it had been eight years in the planning: "Must be a smart guy. That's only six years longer than it took to build the stadium."
• Joe Biddle of The Tennessean, on Kentucky's new basketball coach plunking down nearly $2.3 million for a seven-bedroom, eight-bathroom abode: "John Calipari can now sing 'My Old Kentucky Home' and mean it."
• Jeff Gordon of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch, on former prodigal son Keith Olbermann returning to ESPN with a radio show: "What's next, world peace?"
That's yer brawl game
A five-minute brawl at Kauffman Stadium's "new outfield experience" area Sunday — touched off when a woman walked in front of another woman trying to take a picture — resulted in two arrests and left the children's playground spattered with blood spots, the Kansas City Star reported.
Thank goodness it wasn't Bat Day.
Sideline Chatter appears Sundays, Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or dperry@seattletimes.com